Humour – Page 4 – Raising the Modern Fae

2ft Giraffes are not school suitable

This is, once again, one of those conversations I can’t believe I am having. I should probably back up a bit. For Christmas, once again, my fae child only wanted one thing. Her letter to Santa was as short as it was illegible and only asked for a toy baby giraffe. Sounds easy, right? Well,Continue reading “2ft Giraffes are not school suitable”

8 can’t be in phone numbers

So, recently I ended up in a conversation with my fae child that had more of an effect on her than I expected. Whilst running around with a calculator (it was a Christmas present) she decided that it was a phone, on which she had entered a phone number. As an offhand comment (silly me)Continue reading “8 can’t be in phone numbers”

Christmas is over

So, happy new year. I hope you all had a wonderful season of giving, and celebrated the true spirit of Christmas. In our house, that is the commercial spirit. In all honesty, I have been buying presents for my daughter since October and squirreling them away. So by the time it came to wrap them,Continue reading “Christmas is over”

Stand back we’re going to do a science

I know that, traditionally, Science isn’t a verb. In my world, however, it is, and one can in fact “do a science.” For 12 years, in fact, I was paid to do Science with kids as a job – I taught it, they learnt it… that’s a lie I attempted to teach it and thenContinue reading “Stand back we’re going to do a science”

This ain’t her first rodeo

Or “As it happens, it’s not her first time on the Santa steam train express.” This was unfortunate for the lovely (and I mean that, because they’re always wonderful) volunteers on the train, as she has very fixed ideas about what is and is not supposed to happen. It’s that time of year again, andContinue reading “This ain’t her first rodeo”

I-Spy

There are some games that all children can play (peek a boo springs to mind.) There are some games that most children cannot play (Chess, although my brother was a grand master.) And there are some games that most children at a young age can grasp. I-spy falls into this category: even if you startContinue reading “I-Spy”

The escape artist

My daughter is an escape artist. I was talking this through with a friend the other day and between bouts of hysterical laughter she informed me that she would have ‘nowt but grey ‘airs’ and ‘ave gone barmey’ by now if my daughter had been her child by now (yes, I live in the northContinue reading “The escape artist”

Use your words

We have spent the last 6 years teaching our daughter to talk. Actually, that’s an exaggeration: we spent 3 years wondering if our fae child would ever speak; 2 with various speech therapists, school teachers etc trying to get her to talk, encouraging her to talk and dealing with her frustration of not being ableContinue reading “Use your words”

The correlation between intelligence and common sense

I have long held a belief that there is an inverted correlation between academic intelligence and common sense. I haven’t done any study, I just have my own observations to justify it, and every time I mention my theory to people they tend to agree. I may have mentioned in the past that I haveContinue reading “The correlation between intelligence and common sense”

Stop this Sketch

I am of the firm belief that I am raising a cartoon child. If you are unsure if you have a cartoon child there are things you can look out for that will tell you for certain. If you answer “yes” to all these questions, then you too may have found yourself living in theContinue reading “Stop this Sketch”