Uncategorized – Raising the Modern Fae

SEND tax

I have finally found—after, I admit, a lot of searching (to the point that Meta’s algorithm eventually cottoned on to what I was looking for)—a charity to help us train our puppy into a reputable service dog. They’re recognised by the government and the NHS, so yay. They also charge north of £3,000 per annumContinue reading “SEND tax”

Social boundaries? …. Never heard of them

Social Boundaries? Never Heard of Her. AKA: My Daughter Thinks Every Family Is Her Family We’re in the gym club room. You know the type—soft play structure off to one side, clusters of parents slouched around coffee cups, the air tinged with a mix of sweat, fabric softener, and crushed oat bar. Most children, byContinue reading “Social boundaries? …. Never heard of them”

Parenting the rule enforcer

Our daughter has an interesting relationship with rules. They fall into two categories: if the rule is explained and it makes sense to her, she will not only obey it religiously, she will enforce it with others. And by others, I mean anyone within the general vicinity. It doesn’t matter who you are—teacher, parent, completeContinue reading “Parenting the rule enforcer”

Direct payment part 2

So, a while ago, we got approved for 8 hours a week (school holidays only) direct payment for someone to look after our child. This means that I can get the washing and food prep for the week done without losing my mind. It also gives her a chance to interact with adults that areContinue reading “Direct payment part 2”

Why is it so hard to get help

Our fae is – undeniably – autistic. My husband and I are not diagnosed, but we’re something spicy. We thought about getting diagnosed as an act of solidarity, and were told the waiting list in our area for adults to be seen is 10 years. 10. Years. That’s insane. I was thinking about going backContinue reading “Why is it so hard to get help”

Those who should know better

There are a set of individuals I feel should really know better than to expect standard behaviours from fae children. I take that back: there are TWO professions in which I expect this, namely education, where you need to understand at least in broad strokes the needs and differences to impart information; and those inContinue reading “Those who should know better”

Managing residential

This week, my daughter went on her first “sort of” residential trip with the school. How was it “sort of” residential, I hear you ask (all 2 people who are maybe reading this outside my immediate family) Well, it goes like this. A couple of months ago a very bubbly, slightly demented child came homeContinue reading “Managing residential”

Trying new things

This coming week my daughter is trying several new things. I am aware that new experiences are essential to growth and development and no child can live in a bubble without them. That said these are milestones that I am not happy about her facing right now. Her school wants to take her on aContinue reading “Trying new things”

Ignorance is bliss

Ignorance is bliss. It’s also a good tactic when dealing with truculent, self-opinionated and tantruming children. Following on from my last post on self-awareness, our fae has upped the ante on her behaviour and has decided that she is a ‘hunter’ and that hunters ‘do what they want’ This is an interesting concept from someoneContinue reading “Ignorance is bliss”

Self-awareness

Recently, we have once again been struggling with our daughter’s behaviour. This is a perennial problem that I wish only came around once a year, but is more like once every few weeks. Just when we think we are through the latest batch of rewiring / growth spurts / illness or whatever is causing theContinue reading “Self-awareness”